Muslim Indira accepts Lord Jesus as God and becomes a Catholic

Testimony as told to Fr James Manjackal (pronounced Man-ya-kal)

My name is Indira Monika Dizdar – I come from a Muslim family. My whole family practises Islam. I was converted five years ago. I’m 18 now. Jesus took my hand and led me across a big bridge – from Islam to Christianity. I’m happy that Jesus has chosen me among so many of my relatives and he has shown me the right way! 

From the very beginning I have been unwanted child. My mother gave me birth outside the marriage, she wanted to abort me but it was too late and so she gave me birth. My father left me as soon as I was conceived, I have never seen him. I’ve spent my life with a grandmother and a grandfather. It was painful to grow up without both parents. I was also rejected from the circle of children of my age because I was an orphan! And so my childhood was in the sign of alienation and loneliness. When I was 12, my mother took me to live with her. She lived then with some man. It was for me another shock. I didn’t want to live with this man who was not my father. 

During five days of life with him, I understood that he was alcoholic. Every second day he was coming home drunk, and he was shouting, smashing things, becoming wild. In the home of grandmother and grandfather there was not such situations. I became desperate. I was afraid of my stepfather. My mother and myself were strangers for each other. I was lonelier then ever, I was often thinking about suicide. 

My life did not have a meaning. I did not want to live any longer. I did not have anyone! Only pain in my heart, sadness, sleepless nights, a lot of tears and that was all! All people in town knew with whom I lived and they felt sorry for me.  I wanted to have friends but I didn’t have them. I wanted to have parents, but I didn’t have them. I wanted a smile, but I didn’t have it! One Sunday I came close to a group of people, they were going to the church. I followed them. All were looking at me in confusion. How come that I, a child from the Muslim family, am going to the church, and especially from such dishonourable family. That was strange to everybody! But I entered the church without hesitation and I attend the Mass. After that I calmed down. I felt in the church some strength, something was filling me! My mother came to know that I was in the church and she got angry with me! After some time I told my mother that I would be baptised. She did not accept that what is normal because she is a Muslim woman. But I told her that I was deciding about that and that I will be baptised and that’s that. I was then 13 years old. I received sacraments and forever received Christian catholic faith! My mother even today does not agree with me, but the most important is that Jesus agrees with me! After primary school I started to think in which convent I would go. When my mother learned that she was strongly against. 

But I told her bravely:” I’m going!" and I left. I’ve been for four years in the convent. I graduated from the secondary medical school (nurse).
My stepfather drinks also today. My mother has with him three children. They are not married. There is a lot of disunion and evil in this family! Even though I have had forever the feeling of inferiority, I have never felt family love, and I’m often sad because of all that, I have the greatest happiness – My Lord Jesus Christ! I want to be completely His! I read about your co-operator Joseph from Germany. I also have not experienced that somebody calls me “My daughter.” I’m from the Muslim family. 

Our God is a mighty God!!! Father James I would awfully like to go with you around the world and to tell everyone that our God is a Mighty God! I would like to be your co-operator, I know that it is maybe impossible, but still I tried. I would like to be near you and to help you. I believe that Jesus wants that. I recommend myself into your prayers. The greatest gift would be for me the answer to this letter or testimony or request! Many other things Jesus have done in my life! One father charismatic was telling me: “You will become a bridge between Islam and Christianity!” I want to become the bridge. Jesus told me during this seminar that I have to get in touch with you and so I’m doing it. Only Jesus knows why. Maybe he would tell you!
I’m looking forward to your reply. I pray for you and I thank God for you daily. Your sister in Christ Jesus, Indira Monika Dizdar. I’m ready for everything that Jesus wants from me! God bless You!
I hope that I will get the greatest and the most beautiful gift – your answer!